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Sunday 8 December 2013

My Big Day Out

I have had an affinity with Manchester United ever since I was young. David Beckham’s goal from the half way line in 1996 saw to that. A year later when he got sent off in the World Cup, I cried. My mum sat on my bed that night and assured me he’d be alright in the long run. I guess she was right. It was only when Derby were struggling in the Championship in the early 2000’s that I decided to support my local team. What a fantastic decision, because at this rate we’ll be passing them next season.

I’ve never prescribed to this view of hating Manchester United. I always want them to win the Premier League and Champions League, even though I am not what you’d call a supporter. So when the chance arose to attend a Man Utd press conference courtesy of one of their sponsors, I jumped at it (actually, that’s a lie - I deliberated for 3 days whether it was worth losing a full day’s work over it, and in the end I decided it was). I was going to Old Trafford to ask some of the best players in the world some questions!!!  It didn’t really turn out like that though.

I had to kill time on my arrival so I walked around the Megastore which was frequented by a rather large number of Chinese people. Proof if needed that this is one of the biggest clubs in the world. Replica shirts donned the walls. A shirt with all the official badges and Van Persie 20 on the back cost a mouth watering £75. Football has gone to the dogs. Back in my day, when I was a lad, it cost 75p per letter and £1.50 per number. For that reason I rarely ventured further than (Mart) Poom 1.Interestingly, Poom was number 21, but even at that age I knew I was pretty tight with money, so that was £1.50 saved.

I arrived in the suite where I was told to meet, walked through a door and was greeted by a spectacular view of the pitch and stadium. This was base for the next 4 hours. For the first part of the day I was introduced to various people as a “competition winner”. Competition winner? It made me sound like I’d coloured in a pretty picture and been asked to turn up to Old Trafford to collect my prize. I’d turned down good pay and a shift as an actual journalist to be branded a competition winner. “This is Jonathan, he correctly identified that David De Gea’s playing position is a goalkeeper! Who’s a clever boy!?” After a while I found the heart to declare I hadn’t actually won a competition, and was there in fact, as a blogger.

This wasn’t a real press conference. I was there with two season ticket holders who legitimately won a competition – fair play to them - and one other blogger.  A week before the visit I was asked to submit a few questions to the players. They would have to be approved by the club. There was no room for adding extra questions on the day. God forbid we go off script and ask about something else.

Anders Lindegaard, Johnny Evans, Sam Johnstone, Phil Jones and Chris Smalling all turned up at different times in their full kit, complete with gloves and boots. I know what you’re thinking... He’s a goalkeeper.
 They were doing a photo shoot as well as well as this mock conference. Anders walked in first and shook us all by the hand and answered our cutting edge questions: “What’s your favourite celebration/Who do you think is the best player United have had in the last 20 years/Do you prefer cats or dogs?” The last one is a joke, but the whole scripted nature of it left a sour taste. This is not how press conferences work. Trust me, I know, i’ve been to at least 6 (maybe 7).

I asked Chris Smalling which sport he’d be a professional in if it wasn’t football. He replied with tennis. That should have been it.; there was no scripted question after that. Wrap up, Jonno!!! I don’t know what came over me though and I did something utterly outrageous which I still wake up in cold sweats about to this very day. I asked an unscripted question. “Who’s your favourite tennis player then Chris?”. Jaws hit the floor. Eyes were burning through me. I’d just rebelled! Bloody journalists. Ps. Roger Federer.

I am taking nothing away from the players. They were all very friendly and happy to pose for photos (that also doesn’t happen at proper press conferences “Excuse me David Moyes, after i’ve asked you this question, how about a photo for my Facebook profile pic?”). Footballers get a bad reputation, but these 5 came across extremely well. They didn’t act as if it was a burden to speak to these competition winners (and me) and they all went up in my estimation.

When i’m in certain situations, my style of questioning takes an unusual route. I tend to focus on negatives. I wanted to know who the chaps think will win the World Cup. I could have just asked them that, but for some reason I said: “Sorry to rub this in lads (Anders and Johnny) but you aren’t going to the World Cup. That said, who do you think will win it?”. They didn’t laugh at this unique style, but likewise I didn’t get thrown out of the stadium.

We waited to see if Nemanja Vidic would come in for a few minutes because he was in a suite further down entertaining some other sponsors. He didn’t come in though, and i’m grateful for it really because I don’t think he’d appreciate my style of questioning. The day was over. I left and made my way for a tram. I was stood opposite a very young chav wearing a full Adidas tracksuit and holding a plastic bag. In it were several packs of fizzy Chewitts. Give it a few years and the Chewitts will turn to knives.

The article I was supposed to write about the day for the blogging site I was representing had to be sent off for Manchester United to approve. No, really. Apparently, they didn’t want any further bad press considering their on the field problems this year. This article hasn’t been sent to Manchester United for their approval, because frankly, it wouldn’t get it. I’d be the most wanted man since Edward Snowden if they read this. With that in mind, i’m off to gain asylum in Ecuador...





Sunday 29 September 2013

Nigel Clough sacked by Derby County

There was a pouring of outrage, shock, confusion and relief last night as news emerged that Nigel Clough had been sacked as Derby County manager. Judging by the majority of tweets and phone calls however - along with the thoughts of people such as Robbie Savage - anger and upset edge out happy and excited in the emotion stakes. But why?

Brian Clough’s departure was the worst moment in Derby County’s history. Clough snr’s work put Derby on the map. Sacking his son amounts to sacrilege in the eyes of supporters who had to witness a messy and heartbreaking divorce the first time round. “You should never sack a Clough” is something i’ve heard many fans say. The difference is though, when Sam Longson and the Derby County board of directors made Brian’s position untenable in 1973, Derby were deprived of the European Cup’s Nottingham Forest later went on to win. When Sam Rush phoned Nigel Clough last night (poor form if true) to sack him, he deprived the Derby County fans of...another mid-table finish in the Championship and another season of infuriating fluctuations in form. That’s the truth.

Despite his legendary status at Forest, Nigel Clough is a Derby man and when he was appointed in January 2009, i’m pretty sure 99% of Derby fans wanted him to succeed, and the disappointing thing is that he didn't, at least not on the pitch anyway. Few managers will have the initial level of support in the stands that Nigel Clough was granted when he turned up almost 5 years ago. There should be no room for sentimentality in professional sport, but if a sentimental appointment comes off, it’s all the sweeter. I lost faith in Clough last season, but his sacking still hurt me a little bit because it would have been brilliant for Nigel to continue Brian’s legacy and take Derby into the Premier League. When you realise that isn’t going to happen though, you need to make hard decisions. It’s a bit like being in a relationship; if it’s not working, you have to let her/him go. “It’s not you, it’s me/if you love them, let them go/insert cliché here”

I mentioned Nigel Clough didn’t succeed on the pitch. Mid-table finishes were accomplished, but only after often intense flirting with relegation. Derby were never serious play-off contenders under Clough, despite promising starts to seasons. This is where the Clough fans make their point though. “Who else could have done better with no money?”. They have a point. Nigel did a superb job of cutting the wage bill, getting rid of the deadwood, and assembling a good, young squad by giving academy products a chance and buying some gems from the lower leagues. Would Will Hughes have played as much professional football under someone like Billy Davies? No. Would John Brayford be the Premier League star he is today if Nigel didn’t spot his potential (I jest, come back to Derby, John, you're brilliant!). Off the pitch, Nigel Clough did a superb job.

So, to answer the question posed by Clough supporters, no, perhaps no-one could have done better than Clough to get Derby where they are now. That’s when you have to ask the question “Who else could do better with this squad of players?” The answer to that, sadly, is plenty. His lack of man management skills and tactical nous saw Derby lose games that should have been won. Sitting back on a one goal lead with a defence as fragile as Derby’s is not the way to success. Openly criticising his players sits uncomfortably with me and cannot do anything for the player’s confidence. The point is, Nigel did a great job to set the foundations, but he took the club as far as he could. It’s now time for someone else to take this talented squad to the next level. I’m not going to go into candidates here.

The board are going to get a slating for this from pro-Clough supporters and casual fans and pundits. They haven’t given him millions to spend, but by no means have they flat-out denied him either. Decent money was spent on Conor Sammon, Richard Keogh, Jason Shackell, Johnny Russell and even Chris Maguire, to name a few. Attendances have dropped alarmingly, and as an owner of the club who relies on income from bums on seats, that’s a huge issue. Attendances were averaging around 28,000 on Clough’s arrival. This season they are around the 22,000 mark. It’s a problem that can’t, and hasn’t been ignored. The main issue I have is the timing of it. It’s given the Forest fans something else to brag about. Agent Clough and all that. Enough about them though.

It’s a sad moment, but the head needs to rule the heart in football, and on this occasion I believe it has done. So thank you Nigel. I, along with most Rams fans, am grateful for you clearing up the mess left by Paul Jewell and Billy Davies and giving us a great platform to build on, but it was time to move on. Best of luck in the future. It’s not you, it’s me...


Christ, this was a bit serious. Next time i’ll tell you about the time a Sun Care Adviser convinced me to uncharacteristically spend 19 Euros on some Aloe Vera aftersun!
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Wednesday 1 May 2013

The perils of broadcasting, ITV & Mourinho

JM: “I want be…I would love to be where people love me to be…”
GC: “We’ll take that as England, gotta go!”
And with that short exchange, Gabriel Clarke and ITV infuriated a nation of football lovers. Where did you have to go Gabriel? The toilet? Seriously though, Gabriel Clarke was not at fault. He was made to look the idiot by his bosses, much like James Corden was when he was ordered to cut Adele’s winning speech short at the Brits. The similarities? Both were on ITV. The difference?  Mourinho was about to sell his soul to Gabriel Clarke. He was going to tell him everything. Afterall, ITV form part of the English media that Jose so loves. With Adele? She was about to reel off a long list of people who helped her make an album. Thrilling hey?
Cutting Mourinho off last night was a crime against sport and another black mark against ITV’s coverage of football. Remember when they missed England’s opening goal of the 2010 World Cup? No? Me neither because I’m not fortunate enough to have HD television, however, they definitely did cut to an advert just before Steven Gerrard slotted in! The Champions League is split between ITV and Sky Sports. There’s absolutely no way Sky Sports would have cut the Special One off in order to hit the adverts/news on time.
It would almost be like President Obama giving a news conference to the written press. “Gentleman, we have identified the target the terrorists want to hit!” “Oh stop there please Barack, my pen has run out! Sods law. We wish you the best of luck in protecting that place though! See ya!”
As a man who works in the world of sports broadcasting, albeit on local radio and not on national television, I feel strongly about last night’s cock-up (if you can’t tell). I’m going to let you into the depths of my professional life as I vaguely explain to you how things like this work.
You have to hit the news on time at the top of the hour, and usually this is no problem. As a studio producer for live football games, I am in the studio pressing the buttons and chatting to the presenter instructing him about timings etc. Everything is done to the second so we can opt in to the news on time. For night games we have less time on air after the full time whistle, so timings are tighter and it’s sometimes a struggle to fit everything in, but we’re always keen to hear live from the Derby manager Nigel Clough, particularly if the result is an important one or something huge has happened. The listeners deserve it; they have invested their time listening to the game and want to hear the manager explain himself if the Rams have performed abjectly (it does sometimes happen ya know). Sometimes he will turn up at 21:57 and our programme finishes at 22:00. Three minutes is not enough, so what do we do? What we do is what ITV should have done. Go to the news late. It’s a decision that the senior man usually makes, which in this case is usually my good colleague and presenter Owen. I will then work out the best way to end the programme and get to the news or the next programme.
It’s not fantastic, but it’s the right thing to do. We live in a world where news is readily available. Everyone with a TV has access to a 24 hour news channel. Everyone with a phone or a computer has access to the internet. If they are so desperate for the news, they can find it. Last night, the person producing/directing ITV’s coverage should have had a) the knowledge to realise they were on to something big, and b) the balls to keep the programme on air for an extra 2 minutes. The ironic thing is, by cutting the programme short to go to the news, THEY MISSED THE NEWS! Mourinho was the news.
I understand that the pressures on a national television broadcaster are much greater than those on a local radio station, but what would have happened if the News at 10 changed to the News at 10:02? Would anyone have died? You’d hope not – this is not North Korea! ITV would obviously have had a contingency plan for if the game went to extra time, so there was an opportunity to stay on air later. Unless of course their plan was Adrian Chiles signing off saying “So folks, great game and we have extra time. If you want to know the result, check the papers tomorrow. We’re off to the news. Night night!”
Sky Sports News got the in depth interview with Mourinho afterwards, but the damage was done by then. The excitement had gone. We knew what Mourinho was going to say. ITV had the chance to get a world exclusive, and they cocked it up, sadly, not for the first time.
I hope you have found this insight into the production of broadcasting interesting. I guess everyone makes mistakes hey, but last night’s was avoidable. So yeah…I expect an 880 word complaint put on my desk next time I press the wrong button on 104.5, 95.3 and 96FM.

And if you want to see what I’m talking about, here’s the link
http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/the-tweets-itv-cut-off-jose-mourinho-just-as-the-special-one-is-about-to-open-up/

Wednesday 13 March 2013

Clough out, McDermott in?!?


Many fans of football were surprised with the sacking of Brian McDermott earlier this week. Football is a results business, so it is perhaps no real surprise at all that he got sacked. However, considering what he achieved with Reading the decision is hard to take by many. He has become a victim of his own success, much like Nigel Adkins months prior. Such is McDermott’s stock however that unhappy fans of other clubs may start wishing for such an unemployed manager. Off the back of the McDermott sacking, a friend of mine tweeted “There’ll be a few in the Championship who speed up removing their manager”. Whilst I am not in any way suggesting the Derby board are looking to get rid of Nigel Clough, it is perhaps a fitting time to assess his standing at the club.

The Rams haven’t won in 8 games and have alarmingly gone from comfortably flirting with the top half of the table, to contemplating gate crashing the race to League 1 (Don’t do it!!). Somewhat more alarming is the manner in which things have transpired in recent weeks. Poor defensive displays continue to go hand in hand with shyness in front of goal, all with a threadbare squad (whilst Nathan Tyson, Theo Robinson and Tom Naylor are out on loan).  

Tactical decisions have been baffling. The decision to persist with Adam Legzdins in goal, despite his declining form in recent weeks is a strange one (although I am definitely not placing all the blame on him; that would be absurd and unfair). The idea of having two competitive goalkeepers though is that they push each other. Stephen Bywater’s form deteriorated towards the end of his Rams career because he had no serious threat to his Number 43 jersey in Saul Deeney. In Frank Fielding, Legzdins is up against a legitimate contender. A change in goalkeeper is perhaps now necessary, and that’s no slight on Legzdins as he has largely impressed during his 30 games stint. He will come back stronger from his experience – assuming that he is actually dropped any time soon. Michael Jacobs has recently found himself out in the cold. History suggests with Clough that once a player is out in the cold, he struggles to find true warmth again. Such warmth cannot be achieved by wearing a Slanket or a Onesie either.

If Clough ever has to write a CV, then he will not be able to include “Impressive away record with Derby County”. He has managed the Rams 104 times away from home in competitive action, with a return of 22 wins. Under Billy Davies in the promotion season, there were 12 away wins. Under George Burley in the 04/05 season, there were 12 away wins. Performances on the road this year have perhaps warranted more, but the results don’t lie. For some reason, Derby have been poor away from home under Clough. It wouldn’t be such an problem if they didn’t have to play 23 games away from Pride Park every season.

It is no secret that finances at Pride Park are tight. Clough’s biggest success at Derby - aside his successful knee to the back of Billy Davies’ leg - has been assembling a competitive, and potentially very good team with very little to play with, wonga wise. Many managers under such constraints may not have stuck around for as long as Clough. Remember Mark Hughes who walked away from Fulham believing they were not ambitious enough? He ended up at money bags QPR. Fine job he did there too... So it’s testament to Clough that he is even in a position to still be sacked.

However, whilst Derby are not the Bill Gates of the football world, they’re hardly the man stood outside Tesco’s every day trying to sell Big Issue’s either. The £1.2 million spent on Conor Sammon shows that money has been available. Sammon is a bit like Marmite, in the sense that most people don’t tend to like him. Judging him on goals alone, he has been an expensive failure. His game isn’t about scoring goals though, and it’s not his fault that the Rams spent an unusually large amount on a striker that doesn’t score goals. That fault lies with the manager.

What also lies with the manager is the annual decline in form. Derby’s seasons have an air of inevitability about them. The moment fans start to dream of a playoff push, form deteriorates and at best the season turns into a bit of a relegation battle, and at worst it turns into a nothing season. Zero excitement. Sadly, whenever Derby find themselves in the play-off places in November-January, it’s hard to enjoy because you just know it is unsustainable. Unlike Cardiff City who usually give their fans hope until late April before crashing and burning, Derby fans tend to know in early February that it’s another wasted season.

In Clough’s defence, the football Derby have played this year has generally been aesthetically pleasing, more so than previous seasons and under previous managers. He can spot a good player for a cheap price (he can also spot a striker that doesn’t score for £1.2 million, before you mention it!). He has given youth a chance and been rewarded, and as already mentioned, he’s working with at least one hand (metaphorically) tied behind his back when it comes to money. Clough is a Derby man. He cares about the club and another disappointing season will undoubtedly annoy him as much as it does the paying punter.

However, things are going stale and attendances are going down quicker than Gareth Bale in the box. Increased season ticket prices don’t help, but a football city such as Derby would undoubtedly attract 28,000+ regularly if there was a reason to believe better things were to come. Would a manager like Brian McDermott with an impressive track record be able to improve things? Or would he be stifled be financial constraints and prove Clough to be a better manager than his track record suggests?

Football super fan Albert Einstein once described insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. The same thing is happening over and over again at Derby, with the same results. For anything to change, does there need to be a change in management? With good managers in the market, many Derby fans may now believe the answer to that question to be “yes”.